Last week of 2010....

Back from Shimoga, quite at ease as it went per plan. Got to spend less time with thata and ajji, but was happy to speak to them and listening to their concern and stories. I could make out how old they have grown from the time I saw them last. Age is one factor which has made them quite helpless, with declining health and other issues. The house also looks very different now, giving me a feel that those days are only to cherish, never to be same again!!!!

Well, back to my routine and it’s the last week of the year. We have a project GO LIVE on 03Jan so its quite a task at workplace for all of us to finish our year end and get things in place for the Project. It’s so different, when it’s a Start up and the beauty is to think –plan-work ALL from the START! We are hiring in big numbers and learnt that its not an easy task to find the right skill set in volumes which has strict deadline…IDEAS WELCOME

Looking forward for the new years since I need to wrap up all the things from my mind and start again FRESH! I have never had resolutions nor believe in it, but am more clear about what I need and what I will do the following year. My FEAR with walk of life has reduced as compared to 2010 and hence my biggest deal with 2011 would be fearless and to face things better than before. I shall post the list of things I plan to show interest for coming year in my next post. That’s gonna be the deal with 2011.

Party for Friday evening is almost finalized from Hubby’s side and am all set to join him to rejoice the last day of the year. I wish for shopping but for sure not gonna get the approvals.

It's so hard when I have to, and so easy when I want to. ~Annie Gottlier

SHIMOGA

SHIMOGA....thats where I have spent all my Summer and Winter holidays in Ajji mane ( Granny's home)...It was a beauty those days to pack my bags, on the last day of my final exam and get going for month long holiday.......It just remains a Nostalgia now!!!

Its after 3 or 4 long yrs, am going to Shimoga with hubby for Christmas. Its gonna be just for 2 days, but would want to make it up for the last few yrs missed....
Am so looking forward to this short trip....

Merry Christmas to all.....Have a great weekend!!!

Optimistic now...

Thanks to my blog friends who gave me ideas to cheer up in my last post!!! I did wear my new watch and felt good, reading Prodigal daughter from Jeffery, met mom & dad on sunday, Met my cousins after a long time for chit-chat, had short visit to Tumkur for a marriage and loved the journey, took 2 days off which was a huge relief....

Attended close fren’s marriage last week and it was so much fun to see them tie the knot and the complete ga-ga and drama of marriage is so nostalgic. I badly wanted to get away from Bangalore just like the married couple who left last evening for their honeymoon.
A must to do list is to watch my marriage video this weekend!

Planning to visit my Grandparents for 2 days and will be going to Shimoga next weekend. Am unhappy with the 3 yr gap I have given to visit this place; since this is one place which is very close to my heart after Bangalore. My summer and Dasarra vacations were spent here for almost 15 years and memories will kick start, moment I think of this place. Hoping hubby will like too!!!

No vacation and No plans for the year end; that leaves me feeling JEALOUS to all those enjoying Christmas and New yr holidays and planned it. Don’t tell me about it.

BUT..BUT I have some serious plans for next yr. I want to take some steps , which will even surprise me; but will go ahead to make it up for the ‘not-so-good’ year I had this time, which made us compromise big time and lost out on time, patience, health, money and what not…

Love December….

Lonely feel....

Out of blue, my mood just dropped and thought shall solitude myself from everyone and just scribble it here....Am not at peace, confusion all around me, unable to make decisions on my act right...

Hubby is shifted to new team and he leaves home early morning; travelling all the way to EC, which is not new to me but "am not liking it"...I get to see him for an hour in the morning and hardly talk except for a) I have kept milk on the table.....b) oh u wearing this today.....hmm...
c) Am cutting fruits and then byeeee, have a nice day at work....
Its the same story repeated at evening...wonder; Is this how it is? Sunday can't be the only dependent day for me to spent time with him....I wish for unwanted lazy mad talks, be it meaningless or whatever with gu !!!!

Am not sure if this is the reason for the low feel ...I even tried "Basil tea" at Infinitea but in vain...My brain acts just low..

Will head back home, to continue the routine for the day...
Suggest me something to FEEL GOOD ....

Obssessed with watches....

am wearing my new watch, gifted by hubby last week.I didnt want to, unless it was a special occassion, but am missing him...so wanted to chance to stip open the cover and just wear that beauty....am so so so so obssessed with watches now..JUST LIKE HUBBY...
how come we soo much alike in this case?????

I need to FOCUS!

Have a plan in place....
Promised something big to boss for next 2 days...
I need loads of focus and zeal to move the way Ihave planned...else It gonnaa be huge disaster for me...wish me..wish me...wish me....

Got the time to write....

Lot of thoughts which just fade away ....Am so unable to get hold of my notebook when I want to pen them with exact flow.....so am gonna write my heart out, taking advantage of this time today...

I always had an unusual working routine, since its a different industry type. Pa was so supportive that I could hardly ever take notice of the difference, even be it me working on Ganesh Chaturti or getting back home in the wee hours of morning...As I passed multiple stages, It got better in terms of timing and I was also able accommodate to the demands of married life. As compared to the said yrs of my work life, it’s been the most normal from last 2 years..It can’t get better than this and am not a person who is working just for the heck of it or only for money. Keeping all this in mind, I refuse to justify anymore to anyone!!!!! YES, what I have chosen now requires loads of commitment, which is proportional to the time taken. Am stressed and have my ways of unwinding it; be it consoling at self that this is what I have chosen. Am not even cribbing that this path doesn’t allow me to take vacation currently and had to cancel my yr end plan with hubby. This leaves me bitter but thats fine....No Justifying again!!!!! I might not be able to walk in home by 6 PM or not hit the bed at 10 PM, I still feel this is ok since I have walked in here for a purpose....I still do my duties of waking on time to boil the Milk to put those clothes into the machine to my domestic duties at home....No Justifying either ways.....
Am still heavy at heart today.....Balancing act can be tough!!!!

Another thing which stuck me is about CARING...This word can be beautiful and dangerous too..We all care for the person we love, for the family and Frens. I strongly feel the amount of CARE should be limited depending on the intimacy with the person and also with the relationship you carry. It should not go to an extent where it starts acting as a friction to the personality type you are!!!! U agree???

I limit my expressions , feelings, comments, Opinions and demands keeping the person in mind. If your personality don’t demand so much OVER-caring, then why? Am one such person who just can’t taken overflowing of such things from anyone be it, except from Hubby which I enjoynit to unwind and bring that life back to my routine...hmmm......

Tomorrow Hubby and gang leave to Munnar and Thekkady and am all set to wave Goodbye for the vacation.....If I look back at this year, which has been a lot of bumpy ride so unexpected most of the times, I have started to take these things with just a SMILE.....

We moved into new office and that makes me few kms nearer to home. I plan to start driving to work, makes me less dependent on the public transport, my major worry being the Auto’s. In past 1 month, I had to wait average of 30 mins to get an auto back home in the evening. I completely agree to the article in TIMES today on the demand and Supply concept...

To make myself feel better, will add some photos........my shopping cart recently....
***That's my dress...Handbag...ear-rings from Goa.....
perfume and Diesel; Gugee surprised me.....

NewsPaper

I have a REGRET....
I havent been able to screen the daily news paper, like the way I used to and most of the sections just remian so unknown to me from last few months....I think its my Job and apart responsibilities, which is keeping me away from this...My early morning tea goes without turning those pages ....

GOA........

It was my first time in Goa. Vini, Bharu and Myself celebrated our Diwali this year in this amazing place. Therez so much I want to pen down about the know-how. It’s been more than 72 hrs am back home, I still sense what was I doing at same time 4 days ago……I refuse to flipside to reality, recollecting the fairy-tale from Day 1 to Day3..

It all started 2 months ago, when I was going through lot of stressboth at Home and work. A routine call to Vini and she just wanted usto get away and have the girlie time. We booked our flight tickets onspot Aug 17th and least did we know then it was DIWALI time….Hubby was considerate and I could sense his disappointment since he had his plans for our long weekend. Got a Go-ahead and our trip was confirmed.The thought of spending time in a beach resort, a new place I have never explored, with diverse kinda populace was itself so welcoming. The thought of cleaning my dust-collected excursion bag and packing was so riveting…The thought of spending 3 days with two beautiful ladies, I have known from 8 yrs was so gripping and exploratory…I so very badly wanted this FEEL, kept it closed until I landed there… It was very well planned 3 day trip to Goa, taking experts advise so we do not miss on the BEST stuff while we there. We had our apt clothing to Itenary planned.

Day 1: Reached airport early morning, Excitement filled us each moment.. We checked in to the resort much before and hadenough time to have a lazy breakfast. We settled at John’s nearby toour resort and took a lovely melancholy ride from the day we all joinedwork together back in 2002 to all the hilarious incidents we wentthrough…Memories filled the air, laughed at moments so funnyfor us today…
Breakfast was English and tea kept flowinguntil noon, unless we swayed ourselves to continue post sometime. This was one Heavy lazy longest breakfast we had in ourlives….Went back to our room to freshen up and change for the Beach….It was agreat walk on the shores.
The dampness turning our skin almost golden and the much looked-for Dip in sea moves us to the world of paradise; so apt to rejuvenate from the heat…the marine holds us there, never wanting to leave back to the shores ( my feel) We pushed ourselves back to shores and Settled in one of the shacks to order our drink and late lunch…

We booked a car for the evening drive to the Fort and the sunset view. The evening weather, matched with sunset near the sea make me feel low and depresses but both girlsenjoyed the calm and peace that throws at you! Back to action late evening, to indulge in great Food for dine and Live band Music at Cavala Inn. With our drinks and head banging music, we were all set for an action packed evening to relieve the stress and what a way to conclude our Day1…

Day2: Waking up without the Alarm and having bed tea with sea view andgossiping with two fav ladies was the most beautiful thing that hashappened to me…This was a complete “BEACH DAY”, with us trying Parasailing and jetsking (I DID IT!!!!)…whoaawwww initially with fear and almost scaring the instructor but slowly picking up the feel and enjoyed the water. All it took was to “LET GO OF MYSELF” and get wet and taste the salt and I was there all happy and welcoming it… After all the fun and shouting, it was break for Drink and talk and relax…
It was sizzling and the TAN started to slowly work on our skin… In midst we had out little fun time by getting tatoo’s, shopping for accessories and feet massage done ( Bliss). Slowly weather changed and drizzle bought every lazybones there to waters AGAIN. People rushed to get into the waters,while it drizzled. What more can we ask???????? It was a view to becherished for life long and none of us wanted to be out of the waterfor hours to come. We danced, played games and sang songs indulged in our own thoughts and company….It was almost sun set when we came out and relaxedon the shore, stretching every part of us while the water hit our feet slowing releasing the tiredness…
we were so much away from the routine and so much of being ourselves and with nature!!!! We concluded the day by taking good shower, trying out ourevening wear, dressing up, light makeup and headed towards Britto’sfor dinner ( Love this part). We had a lavish dinner near beach side and then back toCavala for Drink and music…It was a pleasant evening, amazing crowdand beautiful “us”!!!! Got back to the resort by 2AM and sat foranother round of talk with a glass of Lemonade until we all had to drag ourselves to bed…..

DAY3: Another lazy morning for us to start, looking at eachother and just not wanting to get away from bed…A slight ting of disappointed surrounded us, since this was our last day. Now, what more can be cheerful to cancel all plans and just include “SHOPPING” in our list….This was called the “Shopping day”.
Wewalked like localities in streets of Goa, trying to capture all at onego and take back as loads of memories and gifts for ourselves as possible. We picked a lovely leather handbag, couple of silver ear-rings, scarfs, dresses.. The shopping took so much time, that we forgot about the cruise weplanned and disappointed about not getting a good feetmassage….overall concluded the day with heavy bags back to Bangalore.

As usual the air India flight got delayed and loss of sleep just madeus too tired to be heading back home….I still can’t believe we made it and had such a lovely time. Amde-stressed to some extent and back to work now….Will relish this time and place for a long time and the photos will keep tapping the nostalgia trip… Thanks to Vini & Bharu…..

Its Sunday and....

I slepT, cOOKED FOOD, sLEPT.....and SLEPT.....and only slept.....i woke up to only find that its evening and soon its gonna be MoNdAy!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh......Monday Blues......

Durgastami!

I was going through my old posts and wondered how was I able to write every time I wanted to and why NOT NOW? my fav blogs are pending to read though....

I Visited mom after a month and though it was just a brief, am happy I could make it and reflects how busy I have got in life. It still sends shivers, If I think of those months when I just sat at home waiting for something which never worked out! I feel I have taken many risks recently, which I should completely cut down, sit back and see what is SAFE for me so It gives me enough breather to smile and enjoy all small things in my routine which am missing out big time.

Working for a "start up" has its own beauty and rest of unsaid things which you need to be stronger mentally, clear in what you know and how would you go about winning a business. This is a lesson am learning and so desperate to see success. It’s the WAIT for the right moment, right presentation, right meeting and everything “RIGHT” for which we go through the entire churning phase. Hubby has his own ideas, but I know it’s a NO REGRET from my side. I can feel so much for this place so soon, it’s the Urge to do it RIGHT ( again!) …

Its Durgastami today and am at work ( ahhh!!!). I will be attending the pooja in Mom’s bro place which will happen in grand scale in the evening. I have my new salwar ready and all set for the evening mood. Am planning to SHOP-BIG-TIME this Sunday for the festival and wow, all is so well now…

Masinagudi

After all the Drama on "Possible riot's" Verdict ( all due respects to my country ) and consoling my boss ji's for half day leave for my team, it was worth heading back home and taking a good one hour nap and prepare tea for all and discussing the verdict with FIL....There was work post that, which did not give any tantrums. Everyone agreed to my wish to get some Roti's from outside and that left me with no cooking schedule ( all Happy)......
Lemme talk about this day..Am at work, full of Review session from morning and those frequent reminder calls from Bosse's...Its 7PM and none at work all gone back home to get their baggage for next 2 days! We have planned for our FIRST TEAM OUTING to "Masinagudi" leaving tonighte and back sunday evening! Its my outing after ages and thoug its without Gu, am still game for this to get away from my Routine!
so TATA to all, see ya Bangalore on sunday!!!!
Havent seen mom from last 3 weeks and thats the only Regret!

Daddyz the Best

I walked into office; all excited this morning…It was my Dad’s show in one of the Kannada channel which is the reason for my joy. This 61 yr old is simply amazing in his flow of thoughts, His views to his looks to his composure to style. This was no big Style show or related to movies, it was a 10 min clipping on his beliefs in this place and God and his experience. What am proud of here is his way of handling it and facing the camera so naturally, inspite of being a very common man…Yeah, Since the topic is my DAD, am adding a little excitement and writing….Hugs!


It was a Lunch date with Vini yesterday and had a tranquil time..Menu was simple and Hot Yummy Rice, Dal, Aloo methi and some salads. I completely switched off my work mood and jammed up on our chit-chat and shopping…. I never realized how much a stress-buster it is to look at all the new stuff she had to show and the soon to be trip planned to Goa (Just the girlie gang). We HAVE designed the clothing to be packed to the kind of drink to be tried…Its so much Fun planning and only hope it works for me. THis is much waited, since all my so called “Important” trips and occasion THIS YEAR have been missed/MESSED up JUST-LIKE-THAT!!!

Its the HEADACE!

Headache has captured me from last 2 days, leaving me unaided. I have been feeling so weighty and disinterested in everything am doing. Am taking Dart and heavy application of Amruthanjan which will only help for my night’s sleep. Hubby feels its to do with my eye sight and I feel it’s the STRESS which I have created around me…..I will wait till weekend and another Doc visit for the month….
Its not the HEADACE which is troubling me in reality, it’s the continuous folds of turmoil am subjected to otherwise. ……

Dad and mom had a TV shoot this morning and they sound so excited like the 20 yr olds….They have somehow been quite busy and I hardly feel they are leading a retired life. My dad’s ZEAL to always keep doing something, more on the devotional side has kept them on toes….They will be on one of the Kannada channel for 15 mins next tuesday, speaking about their life and their Fav pass time – “Praying” and their way of offerings to God. Its been one big day for them!!!!

Its festival time and hardly planned anything for this Ganesha….Wish to celebrate in amma’s house, since sissy will be there and already looks like one gathering..I can get away from my routine (so badly) wanting to recently. Am gonna pick up this Eco-friendly Ganesha, based on Mohan’s blog…I have one near my place so its more easier for me. Have circulated the same at work, hopefully we all say NO TO TOXIC and welcome anything EC-FRIENDLY….

2nd Marriage Anniversary!!!!

Its two years, we are married....so strange, so excited, so nostalgic, so beautiful, so mystifying, so intimate, so much so am caught up with so many assorted thoughts...so much "IN LOVE"......So much We need eachother...so beautiful this relationship is and has done to us.....so nice to have someone always there for you......

This last two months has bonded us in a very different, unusual way...Its the times, we had to pull in all our strenghts to cope up...Hubby has turned out to be complete charmer by changing his king size LIFE STYLE and get down to understand and help me every single minute...we are strengths to each other and its this part of "unusual routine" which made me get to know him ALL OVER AGAIN!!! After ages, I went on to look into his eyes for long and say how much he means to me...Its a new "US" after all the eight yrs I have known him and a bond which is so so so so INTIMATE...Its not wrong to say AM IN LOVE AGAIN!!!



Back to my DEMANDS...Back to my collections...Its the SURPRISE I had in store on Friday early morning...I just woke up to the alarm and shocked to see hubby waiting for me to wake up...he asked me to open the Wardrobe....With waited breath, i rushed to the place and there was lying my big surprise pack.....


HIDESIGN
Thanks Sweetheart.....

STOP-GAP

Its 11 PM...very unusual of me to be awake, in front of the system and looking at these research docs. Am waiting for my boss's call so we can go over the plan and I can be done with the grilling session or feedback and hit the bed....
By the time I realise, Soon its gonna be 6AM and need to wake up! uffffff......
Any there who gets to sleep like 10...12 hrs sometimes??? lemme know
This is more of s STOP-GAP blog, so I can be occupied. The silence of night ( here at home, 11 is like MIDNIGHT) is killing me....
I havent read most of my fav's blog from long. I need to cach up what's happening....

I have a NEW DIAMOND NOSE RING, for Varamahalakshmi pooja and so much looking forward to wear my new possession. Its more for Hubby's sake, since he LOVES the stone more than anything!!!! He wants to have a collection and God save him....sometimes people are crazy for all different reasons...I will not be able to gift what he needs even this year. Am defaulting from last 2 yrs and hopefully soon will be able to make raise his eye brows and get that surprise HUG for having gifted what he always wanted....

Am planning another HIDESIGN.....what's say?

"GUEST POST" by Hubby!

Hubby was hospitalised last month with rashes all over his body and some kind of Viral at the same time as his parents were for diffferent reasons...He has been completely kicked out of his routine, which made him write a Guest post for my Blog.....
****************

Disclaimer: I write this post keeping in mind the characters that I think are integral part to me and this is not subject to any individual or to depict anyone in any form what so ever. Viewers are free to read thro’ and infer what they can.

To begin this journey of my blog – though I have one of mine [Bantalpad.blogspot.com] I have made no effort to visit that in a while nor have I written an post in the last couple of years, I do visit to keep it LIVE! I have started this with a BUNCH of Thoughts which are in me and I hope to have captured all of it in my way, you as a reader may or may not be able to review what is the MORAL of this [so called] STORY.

I can relate the 3 characters [S1 S2 S3] to a Time Piece! The Hour Stick, Minute Stick and the Ticker [Seconds Stick]…these days you may get models which may or may not have the ticker but yet this is a component which decides the FATE ~ ~ ~

Life is Automatic, it needs no Quartz/Diamonds or Winding…the only point here is that it can rotate either ways [Clock or anti clock], what’s making me say so is if ALL is WELL then it’s the CLOCK wise movement else it is the other way round.

I introduce another character 4 [S4] in this blog who is the actual time piece having all of the other 3 in him! Approximately Thirty Years ago this clock got its shape and came to the external world, in course of time and action this individual has got seasoned to the up’s and downs of LIFE. I say “SPIRITS can keep your SPIRIT HIGH” while in this case it has been the 3 characters who have been an absolute SPIRIT to the LIVING.

If you ask me who S1,S2,S3 characters are, well I may or may not reveal that! The third character came into my life approximately 8 years ago and from then ON there has been no looking back. This individual has been aside all thro’ the CREST and TROUGH yet has not lost the CHARM and has been a SIGN of the PLUS in my life!

Year 2010 has been nerve whipping year for the 4 characters, it started on a CLOCK WISE note and half way thru’ I notice it reversing its DIRECTION! Believe me, it’s an EXPERIENCE one has to go thru in LIFE at least for being a HUMAN! It gives a perspective of Reliability and Dependability on whose- who in this system of Society.

It’s easier said than done; when you have people who visit you on ADHOC basis give us a DOPE of how to handle with CARE and CRAP!

The PRESSURE is IMMENSE when you are mixed up of what’s in store for you when you actually looking forward to another BRIGHTER day with a RAY of HOPE! I am in this situation @ present! I have liked Materialism in life but the last 10 days has made a difference which I HOPE will take me to the ROAD NOT TAKEN – LEAD or TREAT life with a DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE!

It’s the PHYSICAL PERSENCE which is actually the HEALING TOUCH to a WOUND! No matter how much WORDS of WISDOM u throw on the table, guiding an individual seated beside without losing CLAM is the NEXT best THING that I have DONE till date! This is certainly an EXPERIENCE which has given me a DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE and I strongly feel that this has helped me GARNER STRENGTH, SERVE a HELPING HAND, SELF Mgmt –aside to TIME, so on…
LIFE take a TURN which has no minimum or maximum RADIUS, it’s TIME TO FATE! And then DESTINY KILLS with so much of thoughts running le to your mind and soul. Not sure which one will take LEAD as I feel you will have NO CONTROL on either after a certain point in TIME!

Holy **** I am trying hard to refrain from saying more, b’cos I think it’s more to do with self and I am kind of losing sight to express in words! It’s more of me and me along with the other 3S who are just adorable to always MINE!
Hope this to be the only POST of mine which is to do with SORROW’S and look forward to HAPPY TIMES AHEAD!!!

Without my mobile charged....

The reason behind my perturbed morning is “My mobile is not chargedL; battery is Drained and no power at home”
This seems to be as important as my first dose of morning cuppa or be it my shower…I just can’t do without it at all and seems odd, looking at it almost dead. I just cannot afford to miss calling hubby for updates from home which is a priority, will miss my client calls, updates to my boss, my usual call to amma and my sis or be it my friends whom I catch up while traveling to work or back home...My entire day without my lifepartner ..eekkssss

On the other hand, Vins has so many stories to tell me in a day, making me wonder why I don’t have as many updates in a day. Do I need to connect with more people? My life is pretty much a routine, seems to be.

Anyways, I need to mention HOW I FEEL today...Am coming out to be more stronger, bolder, clear of what I want to do, smile in crisis ( took me long) and still have a LIFE….Today marks the feel good day for this reason…Cheers>

Questions & Questions....

Have been wanting to write and pour my heart out here, but somehow feel, have lost interest in all that I used to be so excited about all this while....It can be the turns my life is taking and so unable to express....another venting out session, lemme try not to.....

My NEW JOB, turning into too many obligations since am unable to deliver what I promised. It’s more to do with my personal issues for which am unable to spend time at work. I thought I went back to joining this place with a huge Vengeance but seems like it’s not treating me well enough to satisfy my EGO. Just messaged my boss will be working from home, which I hate to do and waiting for his reply....Where will this take me? Back to where I was in the beginning of the YEAR? Back to the phase I so badly not want to go through again? Many questions as to WHY ME still churns my stomach and its all pointed at me. I need to answer all these. QUESTIONS & QUESTIONS....

My Family is back home, after 2 weeks of hospitals and surgery and viral infections. It’s another Phase which I want to leave behind the memories and take only the lessons I learnt on Crisis management...I still recall the smell of the hospital to the PAIN or be it waiting for the duty doc to check one by one, to the packing of food with no hunger and throwing all at the end of the day, to asking for Help...It’s all OVER and hopefully recovery is fast enough for me to get back to my routine and forget the 15 days of unavoidable pain, which made me feel so lonely..
Am missing my first cousin’s marriage this month and our 2nd anniversary plans is on HOLD. So all the “pre-excitment” flow is a WASTE. I will no more be a part of the gang, who are planning from the attire to the Drama which will take place on the 5 day wedding event. Cheers!

Venting out???? Oppssss.....

Am COOKING!!!! Oh not really, but at least a breakfast or dinner in a day is giving me enough cheerfulness. I learnt quite a few dishes and hopefully try-out more...This is my area of interest and enjoying it. Planning to check some recipes online, to gratify my foodie stomach...

WHY ME

WHY ME?

" ITS ONLY questions" RUNNING AND FLOWING in my mind and all over me...Its just QUESTIONS.....Only one things can help me, which I bank on completely being a Piscean!!!!

"Loss of hope rather than loss of life is what decides the issues of war. But helplessness induces hopelessness"
B. H. Liddell Hart

15JULY......

I wanted to write this post first thing today, but could not. Its nearing mid-night but had to do this b4 I hit the bed..

Am sapped on energy I carried in the morning, excitement all lost as the sun sets on July 15th …Well, this date eight yrs rear, marks my footstep into work life ( Cool na)!!!

I was sooper-dooper excited in the morning, messaging my few very close buddies I have known from Day1 and announcing the whole world about this…It’s a great feel, as counter to few months back I was even dreading of me not celebrating this feel since I took that 4 months break. I feel so refreshed, after all the Trauma myself and gu had to go through…
All those memories is tightly packed off, we are back to life now…..and feel so good for a voyage of eight years....

It will remain a FIGHT for me to have a so called "a career", but will ensure will stick to my WANTS rather than going with the flow at my side of life…I struggle to express at times, the answers which am not answerable to and those moments so bumpy for me... Hubby is on my side and that’s my ONLY STRENGTH, Like always, for everything....I don't wanna lose my battle....

Well, just waiting for amma, appa to get back to Bangalore. Feel like staying with them for few days...Sissy is all set to spend 2 weeks with with them and am soo soo JJJJJJ!!!!!

Am missing some good friday movies with the Gang cos of work and its one of those days tomorrow...They r all gonna be watching leonardo and am gonna be watching a ppt and a probable client visit...Good NigHt buddies....

And..Cheers to our happy times....

As per Hubby's wish, heres a snap of our's and to make it day tomorrow morning :)

U better take me to another TRIP...

Sad and Happy....

Its early morning, My thoughts completely dominated with the progress of work both at home and office, running around here and there to finish up drying clothes to getting the Lunch box ready and have no time left…Half my mind still worried about the call I had with my fren last evening, who lost his brother in a bad accident 2 weeks back…..I still have questions swirling around me 24/7 ...
I was having a quick face wash, there’s news that this 29 yr old guy whom we kind of know ( My FIL's very close friend family) killed himself last evening….HELL with his life, for whatever reason it maybe, was switched off foolish to do this at this age……He was supposed to be getting married next month and holds a PhD Degree. So what!

I was disturbed….spoke to the auto driver all my way....Called my parents and they were busy….Hubby was in a meeting…. Called couple of my old fren’s and reached work….This will keep me occupied and done for the day….

Some happy news..My first cousin, who is just 4 days older to me, is getting married next month. I will be planning my short trip to Hasan and Shimoga and so very looking forward for this time off. I will not be required to do any shopping, but will be doing heavy planning with all my cousins on the attire and accessories!

just an update

Am TIrEd….
Its lovely weather, unless you are traveling in an auto and getting drenched just before that meeting which is so important….reaching office and no time to even look at yourself in the mirror and do your hair..
Well, this is how my day started…
Work is hectic on outside and taking its time for me to be well prepared and be in the “ACTION”. I have no time to use as probation or training as reasons, every day needs to be a planned-action filled-fruitful day without a miss…..

Life has been pretty much a routine, CHANGES so well accepted in recent times…
I have been wanting one short trip away from Bangalore with hubby, which is taking its own time to even plan it. It’s a huge regret, I wasn’t able to travel for last few months and now, it’s so tough to even get started. Getting away from this city is nitty-gritty for the moment!

Something disturbing happened few days back…Its my fren’s brother who met with a horrible accident and departed us…I haven’t met him in person, but I keep re-calling this ….Its shocking, its disastrous for the family, unspeakable and JUST NOT DONE…I had no dare to visit him / family and have been thinking of at least a message or call, but unable to. I feel bad, for not having visited inspite of hubby asking me to, but it’s so tough and can’t think of anything to speak or console them. I imagine this loss for his family and there is a spurt of scare inside I feel…This thought is just not leaving me……

what's up with me

My wardrobe looks messy....
Few missed calls unanswered at end of day....
I forgot to give my clothes to Laundry.....
I didnt speak to amma for long, had to cut her calls sometimes...
I didnt look at my plait and skin for long in mirror.....
I didnt call K, N, V ....for the daily dose of update....
I didnt listen to next door's aunt story from MIL....
I ate like pig and finished in no time...
I dream of reports and ppts in the night....
I wake up planning on what to be completed and prepare tea daydreaming.....
Am wearing the same footwear from last 1 week....
Am not planning my weekend....
Hubby is away and havent written those long mails and told those MISS U, Love u stuff ....
My novels are lying there....
My hindi serial is missing in my life....ahhhhh Sadhna died and I didnt even know until today...
I don't keep my Gtalk ON....
I didnt take appa out for his Brahmin's coffee....
I said NO to Raavan movie last noon....
No trips planned, its been a month ..Ghoshhhhhh
Havent read my favourite Blogs :(((......
I havent tried my new tee....
Am AWAKE post 10 PM......eeeksss
I didnt have that Ghup-shup with the watchman....
Havent polished my nail....
Any bollywood fights or lovestories in the run???? whats in Page3?
havent paid my LIC biils....
Evenings are without FIL's and my talk on Sensex and Euro's market...
I didnt run to the land line ring.....
I didnt visit amma's house this weekend....
No news paper while I eat....
Where is the remore for TV lying????

...........................well...well....well......Nothing's wrong with me...
Its just that I have gotten BUSY ( ll smiles)!!!!!
Loved writing this, such a relief.......
Miss my frequent updates here.....

I Love VoLvO!

Its boring to drive today and irritating to take an auto that distant....
I have no one to give me FREE drop and how do I manage to travel in this city?
I need to go out for a short meet and have no option, but take the AUTO ( ghosh!) and can imagine the amount of dust that gonna capture my skin and the amount of freshness I would be left with before the schedule............I miss the Volvo today, which I would rate the "BEST transport system".I don't have one running in my route to the destination, and wish there are more buses in future, saving me from this morning tauma.....
This was Just a update of my wednesday morning feeling.....Apart from that, am all happy today....woke up at 5AM, which is the best time to start a day and was able to catch up on many things...

Have a wonderful wednesday!!!!
Loving Life again!!!

Jazzling JuNe

June started off with a good note; thanks to the lovely weather Bangalore is back to what it is notorious for....it just somehow manages to make me feel so positive and good about each day...
I planned a short vacation at mom’s place. When you find nothing to look forward to, just head back home is the MANTRA. This is exactly what I did and came back so-so revitalized.

This time I ensured to convince mom to FREAK-OUT My-WAY! I planned the entire week and it was total fun to endlessly walk with her in the MALL, shop aimlessly, experimental cooking only, evening walk while it drizzled, those never climax chitchat late in the night and making fun to her joining hands with appa, hugging them, well everything just so BeAuTiFuL. It was completely MY WAY and feels so content after long and all the drama which we had to go through in May...Somehow May 2010 will remain a nightmare for me lifetime....

Weekend was fUn..Met with hubby’s neice n Nephew who ARE growing to be total Brats and always a surprise package. Though kids never excited me, its changing slowly since they are too lovely to be ignored and accept that it’s so beautiful to be around them...Played some silly-gilly games and laughed like never-before...Mazed at the kind of question asked and the innocence at its best and how skillfully they get accustomed to your way of talking and thinking and actions....Can't believe its me noticing all this and enjoying but for sure looking forward to be there again in their company ..(few pics posted)

My JOB-Job jOb:
Fingers crossed on the job front, something unconventional on the way and undeniably a challenge to start it, but positively will give it a try and pray it all works in my favour....will soon get to know more details on same and just waiting ....

oH iTS SATURDAY

Wish I could scribble the :"Downhill" v going through.....I instead took the pen and wrote the entire episode in my old Diary, closed it never to be scared of this again..One more time and its last on monday and its OVER.....No self-pity, No more tears, this is Life......
****
Its saturday evening and am alone with my notebook and hubby out with his friends for dinner....Is this called "Marriage-post-1year" ( WINK)...oh, am not cribbing, just thought of something like this for a moment and smiled, so cute...am enjoying my solitude, my silence thoughts, my way of getting back to things and routine :)
"Mahashweta" by Sudha Murthy is a light story, which is keeping me engaged while I eat. Its about the importance men give to "BEAUTY" - FAIR SKIN Vs the reality of life...I do not recommend, but nice timepass for me...Am also reading "The Juror" by John Grisham, something really good and highly recommend..

Ripe-yummy looking-fat-raspoori mango waiting on the table, for me to relish....so tata for now and mango delight time!!!!

Not Sleepy- so this post

Am not sleepy (or) don't feel like hitting the bed on time tonight and have nothing in mind to scribble here.....Its been "ONly-Attend-functions" back to back from last few days and drained me wearing those "Kancheevaram" sarees. I love them, contrary need lot of time and good weather as demand; to tie it up neatly. This is also a means to remove those stacked up marriage sarees of mine, which comes out only on such occasions.
Since I have all the time in the world, to pull those sarees out and get ready was more of nostalgia this time and wonder 2 yrs back, I was so heavily excited to pick them up for my BIG DAY.
The shopping so neatly mapped, the no-silence days of planning and shouting to be listened to and just the excitment of getting married and shopping was all so so so fine-looking. I am those lucky ones, who was all smirk for months and waiting for the day, enjoyed every moment with aniticipation; me 'out-of-world' to be standing next to my hubby and say "I DO".....Nothing could have done better than the kancheevaram attire, so perfect for the occasion!!!! So heres to say I love my sarees, though they r such a pain to tie and go out in sun:(

This is a MUST-DO in this part of the country and not many girls/women like to tie this up during any occasion. But I never felt this way, maybe little old-fashioned, maybe tied up thoughts but still stick to this attire for your day!
ANyone who shares my feeling?

*********
My parents are travelling; both different direction and unfortunately my plan gets deviated cos of this. I was supposed to be staying with them for a week ; then changed to travel with mom and the changed to - stay here in BANGALORE! so my plan all back to Square one, I need to watch a good movie to make it up....Kites-NO NO....This is what everyone, every paper is shouting....
Good moviee plsssss

Dahi-puri NO-NO

Depressing weather is what we call, when it’s Cyclone in our neighbouring states, but somehow I love the non-existence of Sun during my day and more great-feel factor, if I have to wear a sweater....Its one of those days today and lazed around watching movies be it repeat and making that hot masala chai...I did imagine a trip planned to some hill station at some idle time; but none will take place for few more months as per hubby (Cost cutting buddy)...We almost zeroed Europe trip and soon realised what a DrEaM baby!!!!

Back to reality and weather, I called hubby to be back early so I can go for one round of hot-spicy Pav bhaji or Masala puri...( Yes, sounds great and perfect).... Thanks to him, he was home on time and I was all warm clothed to relish my hot-spicy-blah-blah stuff...I kept telling him, how much I was waiting to just go out while It drizzled and stuff in those road-side delicacies ( am shouting..am a FOOD-LOVER)...We changed destination, since there was this new place in heart of Gandhi-Bazar....I suddenly saw the chap artistically pouring thick curd, preparing DAHI-puri and I soon changed my mind from hot Masala puri to Dahi puri stuff.....I took that first big piece in hurry and there My MOOD just went “OFF”, the dahi one was so cold, more on sweet side and HELL this is not-done types....All the vent up “WANT” from morning of that descriptive spicy stuff just made me so irritated and finished up the ordered stuff with a frown face...I didn’t feel like going for anything else, came back home just feeling Cold....Hubby could not make out my mood swings, but I was really disappointed in seconds...

I have realised my MOOD changes so well, the kind of food am eating and how good/bad it makes me feel...I just lose my energy, the moment I have something in mind but which alters to what am eating and the feel is just so Unwanted...It’s one of those days- U know 

Am spending my first half of day alone ( IN BOLD “ALONE”) tomorrow and planning it skilfully; since I want to enjoy the SILENCE....I will not be taking any calls nor inviting anyone and will take up silence as my company ( This is a Kind of therapy am trying) to just be myself..Sounds nice again...I have planned to order Pizza and Garlic bread for my Lunch....so looking forward to...Its MY haly-day!

If you in Bangalore, enjoy the WEATHER!!!!

Hello

BACK....
Lot of CRAZY-MANIAC things happening at my end and personally feel bad am not updating my Life in this this space....
Am still waiting for the sunshine at my end, while the journey continues; the series of incident making me learn so many lessons, each passing day a less cribbing and more of accepting the Life’s sudden threats and module, sure making me a strong person in life....Am facing things, which were so least expected that am moulding to “ACCEPT” it rather than “ESCAPE”...I will do a DETAILED post on the incidents, purely for my own fulfilment ( off course need Hubby’s permission in this case).

Apart from Life’s lessons, another major change from last few months is am AT HOME. Me being ME, is quite challenging to cope myself under the same roof the whole day and experimenting all sorts of stuff under sky to keep myself REAALY BUSY!!!! Am yet to accept, not that its bad to be at home and managing things at this end, but for a person who has always worked is quite tough. Now, am I cribbing???? Lemme stop.......and proceed

I have been reading loads of books back to back and am more in love with them than I can remember anytime...It’s no more my time pass, rather my teachers and my Love again...Am in touch with 2 of my long lost fren’s and its a great to have them back and wait for those calls again...
Am learning my MIL’s way of cooking and I always loved to experiment in this department...Am gonna be one hellll cook later yrs and God save my Hubby( am serious)..Its gonna be so many varities, different cuisines and sure he’s not gonna like it that way...But I will DO what I LOVE; Like the way I married him ( LOL).

My Imaginative powers have increased, thanks to the time I get and which makes me think crazy stuff and put things in action, each day different one from another.. At times, its not a good feel, but atleast am THINKING and Trying to experiment with limited resources..For Example:-

a) There is work on Rain water harvesting in our apt..I talk to the workers on their lifestyle and how much they are educated about the work they are ON. I read on the subject and try telling them...Makes sense??? Anyways am learning 
b) I tried to learn MAKE UP tricks and tried this crazy flashyyy eye-liner with thick Kohl and mascara for a reception party..eeekkssss..But I tried something different 
But I paid a bomb for the coloured eye-liner....
c) Mock interview...I have some close resources, who take mock interviews with me and vice-versa and ITS-SO-MUCH-FUN! Its a great stress buster...I had great time attending 2 real interviews in last month and enhanced my poise so much!
d) I try new ways to impress my hubby...when he is back from office, he is targeted to my new institute ways of talks, jokes and romance (WINK)...Am trying to be good, after all these years yaar..

Hey, Its my parent's marriage anniversary tomorrow, 33 yrs of togetherness!!!!! I have a feeling they don't remember since they are preparing for my cousin's engagement t'row...I have no gift planned for them and feel its too late for anything while I write this...
Am missing my first cousin's engagement tomorrow in Hassan, for which I was so much looking forward to...everyone's gonna have fun there...boohoooooo

Need to read all the blogs, which I haven’t from almost 3 weeks... I hardly get any good ones to write these days, since i have a alter-life..I miss all the action like last year.
No Escaping from Life’s lessons....:)

GirLs-dAy-OUT!

It was a Girls day out, myself accompanied by my 10yr old & 17yr old niece to treat our self a day at ‘Paatshala’ with our Fav Shahid kapoor and Lunch at Chungs( could not miss the Chinese food), shaping a great combo of movie-food and girlie talks!

Now, I was wondering having promised them to take out, what do I talk or how do I manage them, with me having no know-how with dealing this AGE-this GEN. They were always a step ahead, talking from earth to sky, educated much more than the text books and knowledge on anything from school to college to IPL, politics, actress, fashion, food, books....WHAT NOT? While I relished my mushroom soup, i was surprised at the maturity merge that comes with the age the girls carried.

It was FUN, to learn more about the school from the 10yr old; making me wonder how much the ATTITUDE of the kids have changed, same with the relationship between a teacher-student is so much contrary to what existed in 80’s ( My school time). The CONFIDENCE of what needs to be done is quite well imbibed at such young age, which makes a clear path for carrying out the education. I learnt that its not only about academics anymore and parents are so much open for their kids to explore what they need, which is a good sign. There are more activities and facilities in comparison, which might make it stressful, yet a much needed one. Its mainly the "CHANGE" in times and terms, which made me sit and wonder.

Then came some college stories from the 16 yr old, yet again very different from couple of yrs back, where I was constantly trying out comparison in my mind, while enjoying my Veg chowmein. The fun is different, having access to more things and information which can be used rightly or wrongly depending on an teen-indivisual. Its a very confusing age and same with forming picture as to what these young people are upto. Few things I liked; SAY the group of freinds who participate in multiple much forum's organised by college to doing their part for Saving tress to awareness on environment and a strong desire to protect it (WOW) and few more made me sit up and wonder if this is the right age. Its the Internet which is the culprit or is it the exposure to things whichout having a second thought? Yet, so much at such an age.....Phew

I went back to my school and college days, laughing more out of what ‘I’ did, while they spoke their stories. It was a Day-dream luncheon for me, which made it more tasty and took me to a different time. yet; There are so many sweet little things I enjoyed, due to lack of facilities, information, the system, parent's attitude, rules, etc..etc...which made it more sweeter comparatively and more fun which will be so cherished.

Oh, we didn’t miss on some of our fav topics like Fashion, dresses, shopping, gossiping here and there and those light moments, which had to match to both age groups...LOL

Movie was quite and a serious affair, since it was on education system and some reality bites in 2 hrs time. I would have preferred a DVD watch, but got some time to sit in dark and roll into my own thoughts on the subject. Overall a nice rating for my start of week....

Its Semi finals for RCB!

Final it’s a big day for my RCB team, playing against Mumbai! Am tensed, desperately on tenterhooks 'we win' and heartbreaking for all those who bought tickets for the semi’s and had to go through the tough patch of getting their tickets returned. I so badly wanted to watch semi’s in the stadium and somehow never early to book the tickets and later made hubby check everywhere only to realise its cancelled in Bengaluru. I shall miss the IPL season soon....I have never been a cricket fan, but situations like mine; make you just pick up something you have never been into and get so fond of...who knows what's NEXT..

I just remembered in the last world cup, and then working with my previous employer had a team full of BOYS! Now, how can I expect the work and deadline to be completed, when 100% of the team were CRICKET CRAZY lovers, while it was just “ME” wondering what’s in this game???? It was a huge challenge, to work out a plan to divide the team of 15 into four groups and plan their breaks so they get to watch the match in the TV screen in office Pantry (we were not allowed to browse net / listen to radio then), with only a TV avalable during breaks to be switched on in low volume/muted. The motivation level and team bonding was at its highest then, with such adjustments.
It was fun, since it worked out very well and all of us KHHUSSHHHH......I felt neurotic at times, since the only language spoken on floor was CrKcIkEt...

********
I plan to write a book (sarcasm); on the different inventive ways to find the “Right job”. I shall pen down my experience and never know, my known circle and friends might find it useful. I have some pointers ready, which needs to be polished and submitted artistically. This is more to define my state of mind at this moment...
Few people rightly said, not to run behind anything or somehting like that...just keep trying and you will get it...is there a proverb like this????
BUT;Something life has taught me so beautifully in recent times...which I have been experiencing in multiple ways...so presently with no expectations for anything, only hoping the right times strikes...for now, it’s just the breathing exercise for my Peace.

"I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances." Martha Washington

*********
Plan to watch PHOONK2 soon in Theatre. Hubby for sure will never join me for this crazy idea, but am roping in on my niece who is so just 10yrs but doule excited to be watching her first horror movie in theatre. It might be fun-never know!

"KANE & ABEL" from Jeffery archer is amazing read. The flow just takes you to that world, attitude so strong and just contrary to our existence. Recommend!

I have clearly checked and planned some space in the existing garden in out apt. Now, since its taken care by one lady, I will have to make my way slowly. I have selected a small place, where I shall plant "Chanduhuvvu" ( Kannada) which has been my first fav since childhood. The spread is amazing and the flower is yellowish-orange, which I want to be my view in the morning from my window! Sounds nice? Soon, I shall be planting them and posting pictures.

Am full of EnErGy today!!!

Great vacation at mom's house, did series of things with three of them that am yet to be mentally back here at home!
Watched "Aptarakshaka" ( Kannada movie)on friday and surprisingly loved it!
I made it a point to walk my mom through the full mall, since she never really wants to explore it. Its was great to watch her shocking amusement at how people just keep shopping and filling their bags..
Went shopping, YES for groceries and vegetables and gifts for my neice...
I spoke for hours including some heathy gossip and watched the RCB match with appa, which can never get better than this... wow!!!!

and..the most important part of the vacation was breakfast @ MTR. This is like a tradition I used follow with my dad during weekends ( before my marriage) and we re-created it this friday. Loved-loved the masala dosa-jamoon-idly-sambar....Coffee...yumm
ChErIsHeD!!!

Back with full of energy this monday.....Its not normal routine today, going to face one of the challenges AGAIN! So it's gonna be full of tension and the day will fly away before I even realise it. I need some good wishes.

One more reality show from today!!!!!! so Keep the Drama ON!!
Cheers>

School Nostalgia (or) is it a worry?

I memorize a painting competition I attended when I was in 5th grade and won the First place (shocking me) and loved the attention I got until I received the prize. I played Kho-Kho like crazy in high school and take part in some inter-school competitions and part of throw ball in spite of being sick thin and learnt it hard way, I learnt flute and was a part of the school music group enjoying every spot of it for long time and did some nursery kids school day anchoring…..It might sound very usual and simple now; but feels like high flier for me.
“BUT” I never bothered to take up painting nor did anything relate to arts and creative work or sports post schooling, forcing me to think of a REASON for discontinuation.
It was always academics and a rule book life; landing me here!

Being a Piscean, I should have thought of an unconventional career or a serious hobby, which would earn me more “content and peace”; increasing the percentage of zeal; rather than my job at a corporate world. I tried taking a satisfactory quotient on what I have been around for 7.5 Years and not sure if am doing the precise thing. Is it too late to even find out what's right for me now? Do people go through this phase? Is this a 7yr itch? R u feeling the same?
Subject encircling me, cos of the situation? or more out of just Thoughts?
well, at least I day dream so much about such things; be it nostalgia from all these years or just imaginations, proving am a right Piscean somewhere at any case!!!
I preferred an artistic and more creative life to rule me, proving my zodiac sign rather than rest of the things which I rather let go off it.
WELL, This goes nowhere, not concluding anything, nor justifying anything..Just my thoughts on Monday morning…

The certificates in front of me, which I have bothered to dust it off and tidy them today is the reason behind this post…..better not to clean up things ahh???
Maybe a cup of tea will do wonders to me now.....

******

The sun is back, really cruel.....RCB lost the match last night....*My fren's who were in love and court from a yr and helf now finally got the approval from family for marriage last evening; Hubby was so zapped at this shocking news, had to be reminded to HUG his fren’s on their happy moment and a small celebration followed( best part)....My interview went well, but will not work out finally....Dinner at Royal Orchid was amazing, brocilli n mushrooms being my favourite.....Met my nephew for the first time; after 5 yrs he was born and felt li'll odd at the way we conversed and try to bond with his AM Accent.....Mangoes have started flooding my house being everyone's fav here, season yet to start....that's my weekend!

RAIN...WOMEN stories

Something MAGICAL about the FIRST RAIN! Isn’t it?
The Feel, The aroma when it just touches the soil; enjoyed it, with the heavy downpour on tuesday evening here...It’s my first sense for the year and for sure so Magical!
I did not miss the chance to run out, almost slipped to get slightly drenched!
Whoaaawwwww, am not overstating but I was truly overjoyed, relaxed!
This is Bangalore, at its BEST...
*******

I dare say I love 2 serials in TV currently and a reason behind it...NO, No not the saas-Bahu saga!
Its all about the GIRL CHILD and the struggle, to go against the society formed by the upper caste and the myth on GIRL’s education and untouchability. Its too very touching, and lovely subject picked to bring light (that’s what aimed at) on the ever rolling of mental-rational abuse by restricting some class/caste of people from their basic rights. They have done right selection of ACTORS, inclusive of the girl child character which pains you to the core on the never ending harrasement, also states are true incidents which still EXIST.

One particular episode, this little girl is enrolled in school with great great difficulty by the father pleading and almost falling to the feet of big people since he is a untouchable and not supposed to be sending his "DAUGHTER" to school.
But the Father's mind/heart aches seeing her jump at the sight of cildren taking the slate and wearing uniform and walking to school. For her, its such a beautiful world.
It becomes the talk of village, when the news spread of this "LOW CASTE" AND a "GIRL" going to school and the father is questioned from all sides on such a decision. The girl is further subjected to mental abuse and things which will make her only weak and cry for her decision...

For a change, it’s not very pleasing or entertaining; but true to what been shown, something which I have never been exposed to.

So...here its me, with no intention to pop my eyes on those reality shows and high profile drama aired to woo us with the amazing clothes , accesories, gadgets and cars and the women who look so dressed up even while cooking in the kitchen!!!
Am not tired of this, but just a li'll break from the high-society picture and check out the Women in PAIN!
********

Done with reading NAMESAKE and RAINMAKER...Both good read!

The WEEK so far....

whatzz happening at my end?
This week has been pretty peaceful for me, otherwise not so cos of the hurdles am facing currently...Mentally am at ease and so the reason for me to pen down the activities for the week :)

> Visited amma appa, spoke all useless things for hours on sunday which is the reason for the better start. Lunch was superberly delicious and relished it like never before
> I drove after long time and toned my stress.
> Met Vini !!!! As ususal we could only think of visiting shops endlessly and blindly shop. By the time it was time to get back home, realised we have hardly spoken.
> Took Dad and FIL for coffee and while they made faces at Cappucinno, I relished it advising them to freak out at 61. It was fun-trust me.
> Met Kavs, unexpectedly for coffee. My eyes on her Burberry bodylotion.
> Watching 3 new serial in TV, which I had stopped after my college. Am back for it after 7 long yrs and yes lazily enjoying it.
> I watch my MIL cook and can prepare some exotic Andhra dishes, if allowed to try it! Avakai is in the preparation today ( Andhra style Avakai is something not to be missed for anything in the WoRlD).
>My evening walk and the sweat is really doing good to my lazy bones. I watch this group os friends ( women) who come for walk and have some good time away from home...they chant slokas, exercise together which has surprised me BiG TIME.
>Appa is gifting me a "RADIO" and am so so so greatful to his small gestures.
>Am writing some bank Exams next month and something to look forward to.
> LAST update : RCB!!!!!!! Not to miss the match....It's a TREAT watching the team play!!!

LeArN sWiMmMing - The better way!!!

Planning to learn Swimming?.....It's the best Swim-school!!!

Check it out, group of boys enjoying their noon swim in a small river in their village, while their mom's washed the clothes!!! Personally loved the game, they played by diving and enjoying every bit; under the SUN!

We stopped, only to catch them LIVE!!!

( Posting only one boy's swim cycle, rest of his frens did very well, but can't post all of them..Each one was better than the other)

:)))))))) How's it?

My FiRT TrAvEl - (FinAl vErSiOn)

Enter the Last month of our stay, so full of buzzing actvities and it was our first long weekend for Good Friday. Our transition manager delighted us, by taking us to the beautiful-breath taking – “Niagara Falls”!!! It was my first long drive, amazed at the roads and every place we passed, wondering curiously how this place would be, visualizing all through my way. I never knew it was world famous then and just treated it as any of the waterfalls; I have always visited during my vacation with parents back home. I enjoyed every edge of the place, the gaze, the voluminous water, the ferocious noise it makes when it trips down, craziness of people when water sprinkled getting soaked with those jackets ON, hopping and shivering with chillness it brings mentally and physically, astounding sight, the energy it produces and sight of all the foreigners enjoying it with famly & friends, oh-YES it was the most striking marvel I have been to until then!!! I heard it’s more beautiful from the Canadian side, but I thank my stars I got to visit it, from whichever part it is. I loved the first short trip and way back; sadly to mention the first time ever to be mistakenly ordered a Veg burger, stuffed with beef (By default), only to know after my first bite that it is "VEG" with platter of Beef /pork stuffed. Am embarrassed to write the kind of fuss and cry I made at McD, loudly screaming in tears and blaming the counter guy; as if the person had done his biggest blunder / crime in life. It took me AGES to forget that incident, not sure how many people laughed at me or sympathized me.... BUT I learnt my lesson on VEGGIE stuff in foreign land and to do my homework on whatever- whenever I visit places outside my homeland (This incident later made me survive so beautifully in places like hong-kong for month's together, without any regret)......Thankfully and do your homework!!!
Hubby still teases me, I have had my portion of non-veg in life and I just laugh it off, which has fashioned some nice memory for me!!!!

We finished our certifications and our parties continued everyday in our apartment, be it preparing our tea, taking turns to wash vessels, doing our Laundry while we talk nonsense and play games while we relish special wine’s and shop endlessly, frequent visits to temple for food; still staring people in Malls; relishing Pizza’s and carefully ordering food; vists to the pittsburg and Ohio universities, a play by Indians and now that it was almost time to Pack, it was more out of the ordinary to know this land.

Meanwhile we got close to Cathy at work; who was one of the trainer’s, 68 yrs old; used to get those lovely hot doughnuts in the morning; while we slogged those new bank terms and introduced to some custom American mode of food and her stories; post working hours. We bonded grand way, since she was our only means to feel better and ask questions in that unknown land. I liked her for many reasons, few being she treated us no different unlike others, she took us out everyday selflessly, she tried Indian food with us, she was old and caring and of all she gave me a different outlook about Americans, otherwise Myths surrounding my head, she lived with her husband who was old and taking care of him, her children left her ages back only to meet occasionally for Sunday Brunch and she was a confident woman working with so much keenness, doing other social work to keep healthy…all this gave me a different viewpoint, something NEW and positive and so much diverse from the Life I have known!
(Cathy died of Cancer few months back in 2009)

With all such memories and starting to like this new land, it was time for our “send off party” from our clients, who thanked us for our work and tiny ideas to improve the existing project. I shall call this my first official party, so tried some different clothes, which I picked at Macey’s, and light make-up for the party (I was SICK-THIN though) and loved the evening with the clients and our group! More than all, I was content I could face my managers back home. I did get a small award in the party (I still preserve it) for scoring highest in Private wealth management certification and that’s when my love for this subject started.

It was time for us to leave, but had the same sick feeling when I left home the 2 months back. I cried secretly since I liked it here now and realized how thin-skinned I can get. I left with heavy heart, packing all the shopped stuff for the ENTIRE FAMILY (never to do that mistake again) and Cathy was there for us at the airport to see off her Indian fren’s. Hugged her, with emotions; my first firang fren and said our Good bye’s. Long flight, but with six of us together, how FUN!!!!

MY FIRST TRAVEL WILL ALWAYS REMAIN SPECIAL TO ME- for all small & silly reasons.......
Ø It was 2.5 months in Pittsburgh, working for a bank.
Ø I still keep in touch with 4 of them and great frens till date.
Ø My first travel still remains special to me, No reasons.
Ø It was sad to know about Cathy’s death, I still keep those snaps with me occasionally turning the pages.
Ø The venkateshwara temple in Pittsburgh was great for its FOOD and the boys especially never missed the Brunch there.
Ø I learnt women carry toothbrush to the office bathroom, to brush their teeth and do their second round of makeup. The awareness of cleanliness was more after I visited the place JØ I was first introduced to Wine in this place and love them like Crazy.
Ø It was this visit, which made V very special in my life, my closest fren till date. She came to see me off, which was a surprise and she continues to be there for me always.
Ø I got introduced to GAP and GUCCI, GUESS and VL, My love for Brands started here.
Ø I got my driving license back, since I loved driving post those long drives in Pittsburgh.

This place made me love long Jackets, since I learnt to Shiver with chillness, the cold unbearable shocking to me.
Ø Am still crazy of owning Multiple Footwear and handbag, after my client carried them; matching her clothes everyday to work and I always waited to see her-everyday.
Ø I love being casual and love travel, Love cooking post this place…

* This trip, made me see those tears in hubby's eyes and those lovely precious phone calls I always waited at the end of day; is for what am married to him today!!!!!

Isnt this enough to make it special???
Happy Ugadi – Happy new yr to all!!!!

My fIrSt tRaVeL......

This is the story of my "My fIrSt tRaVeL......was on work, to a place far away from home, a foreign land"
(It's a long post and not edited and will still be continued. Hubby wanted this story from me and is completely for him to read my experience..Pls take a coffee break!!)

It was a yr I had started working with my employer, in 2003 when I got my first opportunity to Travel abroad. It might not THRILL me much as I write now, but a complete contrary feel then, out of the WORLD; sailing in cloud nine was "ME" when I called home to flash this news......

Now, what’s it that we INDIANs go through, when we get opportunity to TRAVEL abroad on work? Am still unable to crack the puzzle, but I must confess the FEEL is MIRACULOUS.....well, Back to that day when I had to submit my passport to my manager / HR.

I felt really nice, "hiding my FEAR"; going ahead to prove to be my dad’s brave girl. I was also dating my hubby then, who was almost in happy-tears (Happy since he could get all the goodies from me) and mom scared to send me away from home for the FIRST TIME ever!!!!

It was hell of a merry go round to get my Thatkal passport and Visa and all those paperwork done to travel to States. My mom, who has never experiened such things or never been out much, helped me great guns in getting my passport on time ( will call n thank her today)...I was really tired, forgetting my fears and tears until the D-Day arrived. It was the REAL urge to cancel and get back to my SAFE nest. It scared me more that I will be staying with 2 other girls whom I have never met in Life. Life had started throwing its lessons on me, I had no option but to Live with this for next 3 months.....’ had multiple challenges to face like travelling to unknown country, unknown people, sharing an apt with people I have never met, food, most of all my WORK and training.

After all the drama of saying Good Bye...WAIT....I need to mention this....We were at the airport and hubby had managed to come there to see me off..With my entire family there, it was so difficult to even talk to him for more than a min...As time was rolling, I had to move in the Line, when I see him standing in a corner with tears, me wanting to be there and talk to him was such a urge..He never cried, but realized ...It was this incidence, I got more closer to him and more “CONVINCED” of whom am gonna spend my rest of life with..Its that moment, which helped me FIGHT the battle of our marriage....( Hugs to this moment of our Life)...

Ok, after all this, it was the 3 flights we had to travel for series of hours...It was truly exciting and made me pretend as a woman with confidence...Not much to talk with other 2 girls, we somehow managed to know eachother...The thrid flight to Pittsburg ( Our destination) was 9 hrs away and it was that time, we all fell asleep in the airport, hardly realizing what time or day it was...The KICK was felt, when we got up to realise they were closing the gates and was a final call for us...we rushed like athletes, almost tear eyed, plead the security to let us in...It was then in the flight, we shared our first smiles together...( Now, one of them is my very close fren)

Fast forward.......
We are settled at our studio apt, check the facilities...I rush to the Huge window and get the right feel of setting my foot in a foreign land. Its the same feel I go through, which everyone would would when they are in a foreign land. Its more to do with the difference in the surrounding and less know-how about it, rather than anything else ...Its quite Mixed..My main intention was to EAT something and get comfortable with the new home and those girls.

I BEST MIXED-BITTER feel is what I name the period as, unknow to everything and not sure what to expect. Days rolled mostly in fear for me ( yeah, am not that brave to anything NEW in life) and took me a month to crack the puzzle to "How to stay with 2 women under same roof" and cooking, doing your own chors, freaking in new country, managing work, training and homeowork. It was not EASY for the kind of girl I am but Those phone calls from parents, sissy and hubby made me hold back those tears of insecurity. We knew only our way to work and the downtown in Pittsburg and never dared spend or try any other lane/places to visit. We always cooked in our apt and looked at each other if we had to go out in the cold and spend outside. There were lot of pressure and exp[ectaton in terms of our work and I had the initial language issue in undertsanding what they spoke, expected and intentions. I walked slowly in the lanes, looking(staring) at the cars, people wondering how different it is from the Life I have led for 22 yrs. With all this 'Not so good' and 'Unique' feel stepped into second and last month of my stay, which will totally in contrary to aftersaid!!!

there were 3 more people added to the project, so we were now a gang of 6 and I was already quite close to two other girls with lot of adjustments and fine tuning with each other. we all started to try out different places after work and shop for ourself. I specially want to mention it was the "FIRST TIME" , I was independenty freaking out late in the night, doing what I want, eating when I want, cooking, wearing my kind of attire, it was totally MY LIFE and I loved it completely. No one to question me and the feel of being just myself was simply wow! I loved everyday of my stay there, made frens locally, tried different wine and we even partied in the apt. 6 of us, in different country and leading life in our terms!

To be continued........
Phew...

my X-Team Lead

Met my X-team-lead in the evening, over a cup of coffee and feel so inspired & refreshed...
*I used to be soo scared of her-then, calling me and advising me and questioning me...those scary appraisals with her or those errors! She was a terror
*Today she made my evening, just with those simple talks !

she is one example of a perfect woman, I would like to quote her in my space; for this year's women's day..CHEERS!
She is passionate about her job, loves her hubby and does anything for their togetherness, cooks everyday, raises her two little kids with so much patience and Love, smiles when she walks in at home in the evening, only to be welcomed by 2 brats and a dirty house, so responsible yet so little time for herself...It was that one hour, listening to her cranky stories, but with no hint of crib and so much she loves her life this way!!!!!
way to go lady.....
nice to catch up after 6 yrs and still so comfy and so beautiful....

Saree for my B'day

I turned a yr older on 28th Feb and picked up a saree this time to wear on my Dday :)
We had to attend a family function and had no choice of celebrating it elsewhere...
Just a snap of with Hubby and his Neice, on my day :)

Its the first time ever, am wearing such attire on such a day and so Just a "show-off" post!