The day I had this intuition

Sammu is standing next to me and –[]wan]t to= take control of the keyboard while I fight back…few of the keys are missing from my keyboard and not sure what will be the status in few more months ( Days!).

Today has been a day of thoughts…The day I had this strong intuition that its gonna be the Dday..It was Sep 21st, Wednesday and I was taking my usual walk after dinner…This was my routine from past few  months and I was due anytime for delivery…I just called my mom and spoke to her casually updating my day . I told her that while I was taking the walk, I strongly felt that it’s time for me to be prepared…As per the due date I still had 4 days, but I had this strong hunch that am gonna get my hint anytime tonight. I had absolutely no pains, was feeling very normal physically, the kicks were normal. I slept with a sense of excitement, unble to realize the slow contractions (one per hour)…I was unable to turn sideways due to heavy tummy and I knew it was “TIME”, as the contractions increased to one per 30 mins. I tried to take a walk as the pain was every 15 mins ,  I didn’t want to wake up hubby at that hour. It was intolerable with every 5 mins and with that fear mixed with a happiness, I woke him up so cheerful that its time for me to take my bags and head to the hospital. The usual uncomfortable procedure ( I dread that) was done to confirm it was Labour. I cried in pain for next 6 hrs, as they monitored and finally took me to the L.room. I was so determined and strong to have a Normal delivery that I kept praying I have the strength to push my lil one out. I loved the moment of seeing him anytime Versus the increasing pain to push, while the nurses did their job making me dread this every again!

It was a disappointing moment when the doc said they can no more hold on, as I was losing strength, seeing me sweat and rushed me to C-section and everything else blank…..only to hear minutes later “It’s a son” in my half conscious state.

My journey from here….Feeding, potty cleaning, sleep deprivation and the Struggle due to unawareness….. in my next post.

My lil one's activities

Celebrated Sammu's B'day last month and it was a superb evening. I personally had loads of fun meeting people, distributing gifts, carrying the lil one around and showing him off :) He wore a FabIndia Kurta and I was totally zapped with how handsome my lil boy looked and as a mother, kept looking at him wondering how fast time flies !!! He is a Year old, goodness!!!! I still remember my contraction pain and the delivery trauma...
 Though; the party was Not-so-good for my son since it got claustrophobic for him, but he behaved very well unlike Namakarana! Thanks to my lil gunda for being such a NICE momma's boy.

Day by day; His activities surprises and at same time put me off for all the running around. Exactly a year and a month old, his accomplishment are growing and varying every minute.

Sammu has started to walk without any support...though just few steps, yet a TREAT to watch him put those tiny steps and those small feet trying to balance, his eyes looking at me and expecting that encouragement to call him near me....This one milestone has washed away all the regrets of me "Not-working". Its another beauty which has given me unconditional happiness. Its the best moments of a motherhood and am sure any mother would vote for this.

Sammu loves running to Bathroom and play with water...now, what he most enjoys is me stopping him from going...This is how it works...We are together in room, playing..At one point I look at the phone (or) any work /talk to someone, there is takes that as a good chance to rush till the bathroom door and waits for me to look at him..The moment I look at him and scream, his catches that moment of joy and rushes towards the bucket... his screams are so cute, while he taps his feet with joy when the water sprinkles on him, looking at me to join him and I end up playing with him for atleast 10mins. Maybe this is the definition of "BLISS!!!"

He talks in his own language, paaaa, thataaaa, baaaa and so on...he can go on and on; enjoying himself and those meaningless words are so cute and double cute....

I ensure to take him out atleast once a week for coffee or lunch, so he gets to come to new places and get to meet my friends...he seems to be enjoying and knows amma needs to have some time out. I try to make it as much as engaging but personally love when he sleeps on my lap, which I enjoy my Pastas and Wine:)

Lunch with Vini and Neha at Toscano last week was one of the best times I have had....

Something which I wanted to pen down, for my self...
I have never left my son and gone out till date. As much as I would like to have some "ME" time, I have no choice to just leave him and somewhere am getting a feel that will reach a stage where he will not be able to stay without me. I might not like this since I would definitely need that independence and from him too.I wish to refrain back to my dreams once he is old enough to understand and agrees to let me go out for what I want to do....

got sometime tonight to read my friends blog and am loving loving it....
I wish to make more time....

Cheers