WHY ME

WHY ME?

" ITS ONLY questions" RUNNING AND FLOWING in my mind and all over me...Its just QUESTIONS.....Only one things can help me, which I bank on completely being a Piscean!!!!

"Loss of hope rather than loss of life is what decides the issues of war. But helplessness induces hopelessness"
B. H. Liddell Hart

15JULY......

I wanted to write this post first thing today, but could not. Its nearing mid-night but had to do this b4 I hit the bed..

Am sapped on energy I carried in the morning, excitement all lost as the sun sets on July 15th …Well, this date eight yrs rear, marks my footstep into work life ( Cool na)!!!

I was sooper-dooper excited in the morning, messaging my few very close buddies I have known from Day1 and announcing the whole world about this…It’s a great feel, as counter to few months back I was even dreading of me not celebrating this feel since I took that 4 months break. I feel so refreshed, after all the Trauma myself and gu had to go through…
All those memories is tightly packed off, we are back to life now…..and feel so good for a voyage of eight years....

It will remain a FIGHT for me to have a so called "a career", but will ensure will stick to my WANTS rather than going with the flow at my side of life…I struggle to express at times, the answers which am not answerable to and those moments so bumpy for me... Hubby is on my side and that’s my ONLY STRENGTH, Like always, for everything....I don't wanna lose my battle....

Well, just waiting for amma, appa to get back to Bangalore. Feel like staying with them for few days...Sissy is all set to spend 2 weeks with with them and am soo soo JJJJJJ!!!!!

Am missing some good friday movies with the Gang cos of work and its one of those days tomorrow...They r all gonna be watching leonardo and am gonna be watching a ppt and a probable client visit...Good NigHt buddies....

And..Cheers to our happy times....

As per Hubby's wish, heres a snap of our's and to make it day tomorrow morning :)

U better take me to another TRIP...

Sad and Happy....

Its early morning, My thoughts completely dominated with the progress of work both at home and office, running around here and there to finish up drying clothes to getting the Lunch box ready and have no time left…Half my mind still worried about the call I had with my fren last evening, who lost his brother in a bad accident 2 weeks back…..I still have questions swirling around me 24/7 ...
I was having a quick face wash, there’s news that this 29 yr old guy whom we kind of know ( My FIL's very close friend family) killed himself last evening….HELL with his life, for whatever reason it maybe, was switched off foolish to do this at this age……He was supposed to be getting married next month and holds a PhD Degree. So what!

I was disturbed….spoke to the auto driver all my way....Called my parents and they were busy….Hubby was in a meeting…. Called couple of my old fren’s and reached work….This will keep me occupied and done for the day….

Some happy news..My first cousin, who is just 4 days older to me, is getting married next month. I will be planning my short trip to Hasan and Shimoga and so very looking forward for this time off. I will not be required to do any shopping, but will be doing heavy planning with all my cousins on the attire and accessories!

just an update

Am TIrEd….
Its lovely weather, unless you are traveling in an auto and getting drenched just before that meeting which is so important….reaching office and no time to even look at yourself in the mirror and do your hair..
Well, this is how my day started…
Work is hectic on outside and taking its time for me to be well prepared and be in the “ACTION”. I have no time to use as probation or training as reasons, every day needs to be a planned-action filled-fruitful day without a miss…..

Life has been pretty much a routine, CHANGES so well accepted in recent times…
I have been wanting one short trip away from Bangalore with hubby, which is taking its own time to even plan it. It’s a huge regret, I wasn’t able to travel for last few months and now, it’s so tough to even get started. Getting away from this city is nitty-gritty for the moment!

Something disturbing happened few days back…Its my fren’s brother who met with a horrible accident and departed us…I haven’t met him in person, but I keep re-calling this ….Its shocking, its disastrous for the family, unspeakable and JUST NOT DONE…I had no dare to visit him / family and have been thinking of at least a message or call, but unable to. I feel bad, for not having visited inspite of hubby asking me to, but it’s so tough and can’t think of anything to speak or console them. I imagine this loss for his family and there is a spurt of scare inside I feel…This thought is just not leaving me……